There Are No Super Moms: An Open Letter To The Mom Who Doesn’t Feel Like She is “Enough”
I just ran away from home.
Well, kind of. But not really. I will go back to my home and my family….this evening….eventually. But for right now, a little coffee shop, a cup of hot tea and my laptop are my sanctuary.
Today was not a good day. It was a day that I felt like I was not be able to do anything right, be enough for anyone, or complete anything that might shorten my to-do list. It was a day that ended with me crying on my husband’s shoulder, telling him how physically and emotional exhausted I am from trying to be so much to so many people. It ended with him telling me to go take some space for myself and to breathe. My husband is a smart man.
Why is this important enough to share with you? Because I am someone people often mistakenly call a “Super Mom”….and there are no Super Moms, guys. None. Not a single one.
There are amazing moms. Loving moms. Doing-the-best-they-can-with-what-they-have moms. Moms who have giant supportive villages in the wings and moms who are swinging it all on their own. But at the end of the day, they are all just moms….and not a Super Mom among the bunch. Just moms moving through the hustle of life everyday, trying to raise healthy beautiful families that feel their love while also maintaining their sanity and sense of self. Just moms that are all in the trenches of motherhood together….including me.
Because there are no Super Moms.
We all have our amazing days when we *feel* like a Super Mom. And we all have days when we feel like we have completely and utterly failed at mommying. We all have days when everything goes smoothly and as planned. And we all have days when we collapse into bed right after the kids are tucked in, still wearing our dirty clothes from the day and wondering how we will make it through tomorrow. We have all cried on someone’s shoulder or in the seclusion of our bedrooms because we don’t feel like enough for all of the people counting on us. We have all felt the roller coaster of beautiful, powerful and humbling emotions that come with motherhood. Whatever you are feeling today, every mommy that has come before you or that will come after you has or will feel.
Because there are no Super Moms. And you are enough being the mother you naturally and instinctively are.
Despite the picture perfect moments social media is flooded with or the boasting stories overheard at a birthday party, no mom has it all together. No mom is effortless doing everything. No mom has perfected parenting. No one can be a better mom to your children then you can be.
You are exactly the mom your children need. Even on the days when you lose your temper. Even on the days you call reheated hot dogs and popcorn dinner. Even on the days when you can’t seem to make any of them happy…you are enough. No one will ever love or understand your children like you do. No one will have their best interest at heart or protect them with the strength of a lioness like you will. No one can be a better mama to them than you already are.
Because you are enough. And there are no Super Moms.
So, give yourself grace and patience. Count the things you did right at the end of the day instead of the things you wish you could change. Remember that your children will remember the love you poured into their hearts rather than the piles of dirty dishes in the sink. Ditch the negative self talk and shake off those insecure feelings of not being “enough”. Don’t compare your mommying journey to anyone else’s and remember when the road gets rocky….
That there are no Super Moms.
Another post you might enjoy is 7 Things I Do With My Daughter Everyday
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Thank you for this, I feel like a lot of the times women put each other down and are quick to judge about how we raise our child. We need to empower each other and I love that you did just that for me. Thank you
Yes! Empower! What is the value in cutting one another down or judging a lady who is walking a different journey? We are all in this together and share the wisdom we lear along the way!
The thing that drew me to your blog, many moons ago, was how real you are. Sure, I love your recipes. But what I really appreciate is how honest and relatable you are. Thank you for this letter. It was a much needed reminder after the ups and downs we’ve encountered here over the last couple weeks.
In response to a recent email, I enjoy the variety of blog posts.
Thank you for your readership, loyalty, feedback and words of encouragement! Mommyhood is a wild ride for sure and we parents have have each other’s backs! Thank you for this lovely comment!
Love, love, love this!
I’m so glad, Candace!
Today was a tough day emotionally for me, a new mom. Reading this post made me feel not so singled out, thank you. You are very right about good and bad days. I feel better.
Like!! Thank you for publishing this awesome article.